The 20 Best Supernatural Episodes, part 1

So, I’ve been watching Supernatural kind of a lot lately and, frankly, it’s becoming kind of a problem. Things were bad enough when I could only watch old episodes once in a blue moon when they reran on TNT or I scraped together the thirty bucks to buy a season box set off Half.com. Then, seasons 1 through 6 showed up on Netflix instant. I have not left my apartment in months. I can no longer remember a time when I considered seasoning of foodstuffs to be salt’s primary function. When I heard that this week’s episode is about Sam going crazy and getting institutionalized, I felt a deep sense of anguish, as though I’d just heard terrible news about someone I deeply care for.

It has become clear to me that Supernatural is becoming an addiction, and I desperately need to take a break from it before it consumes me.

Instead of doing that, I spent the last week perfecting my list of the 20 best Supernatural episodes! Enjoy!

Screencaps are from Home of the Nutty, except where otherwise noted.

The 20 Best Supernatural Episodes, pt. 1: 20-11

20. “The French Mistake” (episode 6×15)

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Misha Collins does not understand what this angel assassin is talking about. That makes two of us, Misha.

Between soulless Sam, shiftless post-Apocalypse angels and a bizarre season villain who may or may not be Biblical first lady Eve, season six is a pretty rough watch. At least the uber-meta “French Mistake,” in which Sam and Dean are hurled into the real world, is here to ease the pain. Misha Collins’ performance as himself is unbelievably cute, and we get some nice insight into how intolerant  of diversity Dean his when he expresses his disgust for the names “Misha” and “Padalecki” as well as for the fact that Supernatural isn’t even filmed in America. At least Jensen Ackles is from Texas, right, Dean? As a bonus, there is a moment where Sam points out that in this world he and Dean aren’t brothers. Dean’s reaction to this is to smile to himself in a way that makes me suspect Supernatural fully supports the icky things its fans think about the Winchester’s relationship. Phew.

19. “The Real Ghostbusters” (5×09)

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Two Supernatural fans live the dream of carrying on a relationship with someone who also only wants to talk about Supernatural. Sigh.

Let’s take the meta-dial down a few notches. No, not all the way to zero. What are you, stupid? This episode about Sam and Dean attending a Supernatural fan convention at one point has a distraught Dean telling a couple of LARPing Supernatural fans that they shouldn’t want to be him because his life is horrible. I feel shamed every time I witness this speech. I’m so sorry, Dean! I don’t mean to add to your burdens by loving you! If you forgive me, please give me no sign. Thanks, man.

18. “Sam, Interrupted” (5×11)

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Dean gets out of this pickle the same way he’s certainly gotten out of countless others: by showing a girl his penis.

Who doesn’t like watching institutionalized Winchesters as they slowly allow their deepest fears to consume them and drive them mad? The answer to that question is me! I don’t like that! It hurts my heart! This episode is still real good though!

17. “Home” (1.09)

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Missouri has had enough of Dean’s bullshit. That makes one of us, Missouri.

This episode has the Winchesters heading back to their now-haunted childhood home and consequently experiencing lots of feelings. Hurray! They enlist the help of a psychic named Missouri (Loretta Devine) who dotes on Sam and seems to sort of hate Dean. As funny as it is to watch Missouri pick on Dean, I’m confused as to why she doesn’t understand that Dean is a perfect person. Well, she is friends with notorious Dean-under-appreciater John Winchester, so maybe that has something to do with it. Or maybe she heard some of the harshly anti-psychic thoughts in Dean’s head. What’s Dean’s problem with psychics, anyway? At least they don’t all have names like “Misha” and “Padalecki,” am I right?

16. “Folsom Prison Blues” (2.19)

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These two getting arrested has got to be like Christmas morning for these cons, right? Photo from Oxoniensis.

I love episodes where Dean gets to pretend to have a normal life or a few days. This episode does an extra cute variation of that, since we get to see just how much Dean would thrive in prison. Good for him! I would have bet money that he’s way too pretty to make it. Good for him, proving me wrong like that.

15. “Wishful Thinking” (4.08)

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Dean gets one wish and wastes it on a sandwich. It tastes good, but the turkey’s a little dry. Oh, God! The turkey’s a little dry! WHY??

This is a relatively lighthearted and funny episode about a wishing fountain that actually grants wishes. It also has an unattractive nerd pointing out to Sam and Dean that they are good-looking jerks and so obviously can’t understand where he’s coming from. Somebody needed to say it. Those boys don’t know how lucky they are.

14. “In My Time of Dying” (2.01)

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Look, I know this is a serious situation, but I’ll take bare Dean chest wherever I can get it.

This episode has it all: Daddy issues, Dean stripped down to but a single layer, Sam enduring uncalled-for mockery from his brother, a powerful supernatural being admitting that Dean is very cute. A great episode all around.

13. “Yellow Fever” (4.06)

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Yes, Dean’s scared of everything at this moment, but being afraid of a giant snake is just good common sense. They flout natural law by having no eyelids, legs or ears and yet still being successful predators! God does not want them to continue to exist, but they do it anyway! Perhaps the caption of a Supernatural screencap is not the best place for my thoughts on snakes. I just hate them so much.

Dean catches a ghost-caused disease that makes him terrified of everything, consequently making my heart melt every time I watch this episode. My favorite part is the conversation that clarifies that Sam didn’t catch the disease because it only affects bullies.

Sam: Basically, they were all dicks.

Dean: So you’re saying I’m a dick?

Sam: No, no, it’s not just that. All three victims used fear as a weapon. Now this disease is just returning the favor.

Dean: I don’t scare people.

Sam: Dean, all we do is scare people.

Dean: Okay, well, then you’re a dick, too.

Sam: Apparently I’m not.

12. “The Rapture” (4.20)

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Work those sexy hands, Jimmy. What is this show doing to me?

It took Supernatural awhile to figure out what they were doing with Castiel. He’s such an endearing character now that it’s easy to forget he started life as some boring jerk who was always talking about how rad God is and chiding Dean for not understanding the gravity of the situation. Ugggh. So, given his bleak beginnings, the first time I saw “The Rapture,” which is all about Jimmy, the man whose body Castiel took over, I cared a lot more about Jimmy than I ever had about Cas. This episode is a huge bummer since the whole thing is just watching the life of the nicest guy in the world fall apart through no fault of his own. Let this be a lesson to all of you! Christianity doesn’t pay! Also, I don’t usually fetishize hands, but goddamn do Misha Collins’ hands do it for me in the boiling water scene. They’re just so… handy. Mmm.

11. “The Curious Case of Dean Winchester” (5×07)

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“I like the cut of your jib.” This gambling leprechaun’s saying what we’re all thinking.

Now, I don’t usually condone episodes that cut down on the amount of time I get to spend looking at Jensen Ackles, but for this one I’ll make an exception. Dean loses fifty years of his life to a hunky Irish poker player who I initially (racistly) assumed was a leprechaun, but who upon closer inspection is merely a witch from Ireland. I am 3/16 Irish, so I get a free pass on stuff like this! Those are the rules! Consequently, Dean spends the majority of this episode as an old (but still rakishly handsome) man, played by Chad Everett, who does just about the finest Jensen Ackles impression I’ve ever seen.

Soon, my pretties, I’ll post episodes 10-1. While writing this, I noticed that my writing tends to be very Dean-centric. I will try to have more fair and balanced reporting in the future. In the meantime, I suggest we all rewatch “The Born-Again Identity,” if only for the long overdue Misha Collins ass shot.

Actually, on second thought:

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